Looks will fade, age will not be on your side always and your money will dwindle. But what you are is something that will never change. There are never any reasons to love somebody. Because when you sit back, jot down points and then develop feelings, it isn’t love. Love happens all of a sudden and it’s the craziest feeling in the world. It doesn’t matter how you are, all it matters is how much you’re worth that other person.
But what is that one dating tip that never fails you? What’s the sure shot way to win a person’s heart? It’s being yourself. Whether you’re goofy, socially awkward, violently hot tempered or riddled with the craziest of OCDs, if you don’t pretend to be someone that you’re not, you’ll go a long way in your life.
Nobody likes fake people, right? We don’t want to go out with a person who appears to be the best in the world, only to turn out to be a wacko. Some people pretend to like a certain kind of music, even if they haven’t heard a single note of it. While some like to know lot more about the world than they actually do. From being a self-proclaimed fashionista to a champion of sorts, from being the most loved and hardworking employee to being exceptional at something, people fake these things all the time. If you’re not a serial murderer with three rape convicts, you are free to project yourself as you’re. Be yourself, so your date falls for you and not someone who is merely a figment of your imagination.
What is that holds us back from revealing our innermost being to others? Especially the one we see a future with? How should you ‘be yourself’ on the first date? Let’s take a look:
Say no, it’s okay:
If she/he asks you about something that you’re not aware of, say no. Don’t pretend to be a know-it-all when you are aware that you know zilch about it. Be it movies, music, plays, places or even general stuff. For instance, if she/he asks you, ‘have you watched so-and-so’s latest Iranian short film? If you haven’t, say no. ‘Are you into jazz?’ ‘No’. ‘Do you like to listen to the Beatles?’ ‘No, not really. I am more into Abba’. Or whatever.
Break the ice with truth:
If you’re planning to go beyond the first day, make sure that you’re breaking the ice with truth. Zif you have weird OCDs, crazy tendencies or habits you aren’t proud of, state it upfront. It might not be taken in a good way, but at least it will save you heart break and emotional investment. You don’t have to the same choices and likes as the other person. Because if you’re hitting it off with each other, these little things won’t matter.
Don’t be too guarded or secretive:
It’s perfectly okay to not discuss your life, but be open about general stuff. Your secretive and guarded nature can put the other person off. Keep your exes, religion, cast and professional quips off the table and be forthcoming and tolerant when he/she is talking about stuff. It wouldn’t hurt to open up and let him/her take a look at your true self.
Listen, but talk more:
Yes, this might sound strange. But listening is not always the right thing to do. It can make you look like an introvert who is more comfortable prying into others’ lives than sharing his/her own. Don’t hog the conversation, but talk animatedly, smile effortlessly and compliment freely. If they want you to shut up, they will say it so in subtle ways, so play the field with your conversation. But remember, in your excitement, don’t show off and paint a different picture of yourself than you actually are.
If you keep this tip in mind and seek out a date, you’ll definitely be happier. Becuase the person likes/dislikes you for who you are and not how you want him/her to see you.
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