Hilarious things dogs think – Dogs can give Sherlock Holmes a run for his money, take for instance Snowy in Herge’s Tintin, the ‘Aye aye captain’ smart dog who accompanied his master to his scariest of endeavours.
They are adorable and suspicious rolled into one and will do anything to make your life happier such as wagging their tail on your arrival, occupying 3/4th of your bed pushing you on the edge, licking all over your face as a loud display of affection which doubles up as a facial, they will be your undeterred confidante so to speak and definitely a dog will bat an eyelid when you come home drunk, he will go through the below mentioned emotions then:
Hilarious things dogs think –
1 – When you struggle trying to unlock the door:
‘Oh god she is back! I thought she will go to her ex’s so that the whole bed would belong to me for the night, argh! Why on earth is she even back!’
2 – When you struggle to speak and wave at your dog taking its name and ask how is it doing:
“Why is she fumbling, should I tell her mom that she woke me up with her grand drunken entrance, bloody no one understands a dog, no time to sleep peacefully for a dog, it sucks being a dog!”
3 – When you put your arms around it with love which nearly smothers it:
“You smell of goldbricker, fags, alcohol and all things ghastly, now you are making me a subject to your bad decisions, get off me already or I will .. bark! “
4 – When you ask for love in return:
“That my fair maiden, it seems you have had aplenty tonight and the smudged lipstick all over your face stands souvenir”
5 – When you ask to introduce it to your friends:
“But who brings this many friends home to threaten my sleep, it seems you have adopted a village or perhaps taken over a company lately, hooman..err woman!”
6 – When your boyfriend smiles and tries to cuddle it:
“Okay fine, you wanna do this, give me a belly-rub all night and forget that bitch”
7 – When you ask to show off one of its tricks late in the night to your friends:
“ When did you start pimping me out? Do you charge money for this? Then where is my share?”
8 – When the party goes on until 3:00 am:
“Well then, every dog has its day and you won’t like if I woke you up at 7:00 am in the morning, wait for it girl!”
9 – When you complain about your ex-boyfriend of not loving her it does:
“Get your clingy ass fixed, jealously healed, and boundaries erect, you will be loved more in your next venture, take note!”
10 – When you puke violently:
“I wish I could speak so that I would scream at the top of my lungs to say you deserve it”
11 – When you fall asleep in the toilet:
“ *Dances in joy* the whole bed is mine! ”
Hilarious things dogs think – Your dog is your person and your homebody who will behave equally weirdly when you come home drunk.
